Whenever I reach the midpoint of a book I become inexplicably depressed and instead of celebrating the achievement I decide it is all rubbish and not worth the effort. I feel as if I have lost the thread of meaning that drives it all and suddenly it becomes no more than a wandering bunch of words.
While I realise everyone has their own creative process, I do wonder if they go through such a low. Not only do I lose connection with the work I even doubt if there is any meaning or even purpose to the story. Usually, I continue through it and work on something else as I accept that time will solve this standstill. My latest work is one so alien to my usual style that I am left wondering if I can ever get back on that path.
I am convinced that this happens to me because I do not make a well planned outline. Those who take the time to ensure they know exactly where their story should be will also know where it should go. For me, this is too limiting as I prefer to let it go where it takes me. This, of course, means there is always a corner I have no way out of, a back against a wall without ending and a resolution with too many threads. I have decided to write a thriller and do it via a very detailed and well thought out outline. The more I think about that outline–the longer it sits on the back burner. I suppose the price I pay for my method is to wander in circles for a while and hopefully find which door actually leads to the exit.Of course I expect to find Jojo there chewing on one of my shoes.
The Impossible
Sometimes I just have to wonder at my own stupidity. I flounder about procrastinating about starting work and then when I do I create impossible situations. When I started the Vampiris Series I wrote the three books concurrently as the word building was a large and difficult task. I had complicated worlds within worlds and needed to keep close tabs. After years of work I was determined to calm down and so completed a little romance and the fourth book in the series Florian Ribeni.
Knowing that the next book was going to be a long and complex set of adventures I considered the Moons of Bornak for several months before starting. I was a trifle reluctant to start because this book will have so many elements come together and will be very hard work. Even with this knowledge firmly in my mind I managed to find myself writing not one, or two but three books again. They are not all of the Vampiris Series, but I still have to wonder at why I would decided to add to the burden by writing works in three entirely different genres. It seems that unless it’s going to be impossible then I can’t seem to start.
A Favorite Read as a Child
When I was young a mysterious package arrived from my great grandmother. I opened it with hopeful expectations only to discover a rather tatty and very old book. She enclosed a small note saying this had been a family favorite and she hoped I enjoyed as much as my grandmother and mother had. Since my mother had neglected to tell me about any books she had enjoyed as a child I threw the book into the back of my bookshelf and ignored it for months.
A rainy winter, a bad cold and with nothing left to read I retrieved The House of Arden by Edith Nesbit and devoured it in a day. The delightful story concerned two children trying to restore the family fortune with a magical mole that takes them back in history. The book might have been dated but I loved the story and it still remains a family favorite. If I can get Scharnelle to stop snoring long enough to listen when I read it to her.
Slow Return
Getting back to refining Florian.
